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[09 May 2007|06:37pm] |
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mood |
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 blank |
] |
it was so good.
but now i dont know what is going on.
my heart is slowly breaking.
i dont know how long it is going to last.
it was supposed to last forever.
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[11 Dec 2006|11:40pm] |
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mood |
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 drained |
] |
professors are not being as cool as i thought they would be.
one teacher even mentioned just giving me an incomplete in the class.
i have worked hella hard in that class.
i have an a
never missed a day
and now i am going to miss 3 days she wants to give me an incomplete.
you get mono from stress and this is for sure not helping.
professors are such hypocrites saying they understand about the whole money issue and stress of college.
well if i get an incomplete that will put me back a semester, that is a 1,600 dollar semester that i can't afford to lose.
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[08 Dec 2006|05:39pm] |
i have been really sick the past two days
and then my mom wakes me up this morning to tell me someone drew a penis with the words cock and balls next to it.
it was done in blue and pink window paint and the person who drew the penis
a)was the worst artist in the world
or
b)has never seen one before.
last time i checked i was out of high school and i would like to keep it that way.
i am enjoying my semi adult life.
besides the fact i call my mom every two minutes to tell her how bad i feel
and how much i really want some jello.
anysways 2 weeks left of the semester.
almost time to have fun.
better to be sick now.
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[24 Nov 2006|12:20pm] |
so i have never been much of a video game person
even back in the day it was duck hunt only
even mario was too much for me
but i must admit i am in love
with a little system called Wii
honestly most fun you will ever have
and i am good at it
really good
so pretty much i am addicted
and my gaming boyfriend loves me even more because i like to play video games.
everyone go get a Wii, 1,000 times better then PS3.
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| summary of best weekend ever. |
[14 Nov 2006|10:43pm] |
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mood |
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 giddy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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minus the bear |
] |
i thought it would be fitting to post an entry about last weekend.
i dont know what i am going to say
but i do know it was one of the best times of my life.
friday i woke up and had a long awaited talk with my mom.
i didnt really want to have this talk but i feel so much better now.
i feel our relationship is only stronger for it.
then that night i went to minus the bear with alex.
i ran into steph which made the night that much better.
minus the bear was amazing and so was the rest of the weekend.
i was submerged in a variety of music at a music festival on saturday.
i left with a better appriciation for not only musicians, but life as well
ps rapture and metric are sooooooooooo amazing.
to sum it up good music, great city, amazing company.
who knew, i just may have a heart...there is hope for me.
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[08 Nov 2006|12:23am] |
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mood |
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 content |
] |
even though school is really hard right now.
and work is long and tedious...
i am so happy.
he makes me so happy.
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[26 Oct 2006|04:21pm] |
i drive fast
i walk fast
i talk fast
i think fast
why am i trying to speed up a life that is flying by me.
really really bad day today.
and it just got a whole lot worse.
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[07 Oct 2006|06:19pm] |
my brother gets married in a week.
it is coming so soon.
it is kind of weird to think he is going to be married.
excited but also in weird way i am kind of sad.
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[01 Oct 2006|10:32pm] |
i am starting to get overwhelmed.
i really need a day of rest.
"I know you can be under whelmed, and you can be overwhelmed, but can you ever just be, like, whelmed?"
"I think you can in Europe."
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[23 Sep 2006|07:25pm] |
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mood |
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depressed |
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i didnt think it would be this hard.
how do you say goodbye to the person who has been there since first grade.
who truely understands you.
today was really hard.
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[17 Aug 2006|11:10pm] |
I now understand why people work at in n out for like ten years and then end up being a manager.
i have always been told i was an old soul, so mature for my age.
well i am 18.
i am terrified of everyone leaving and me not having any friends.
i dread college.
i dont want to make real decisions.
serious relationships scare the shit out of me.
i feel that fear is running my life right now.
the fear of change.
of loneliness.
of commitment.
the fear of getting taken advantage of.
THE FEAR OF BEING CONTENT WITH STAYING WHERE I AM.
i cant stay here.
i am 18 years old yet fear runs my life like a 10 year old girl who is afraid of what lies beneath her bed.
i need to grow up.
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| life is complete |
[08 Aug 2006|06:34pm] |
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i had the person in front of me pay for my toll coming home today.
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[03 Aug 2006|01:00am] |
i am leaving for laguna in the morning.
work i will not miss you.
vacaville i will not miss you.
people i will miss you.
i need to get away but at the same time i am addicted to my friends. i want to spend every remaining second of summer with all of them.
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| the new me. |
[01 Aug 2006|01:50am] |
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mood |
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happy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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the veronicas |
] |
i am suprisingly happy right now.
usually i would be freaking out right about now feeling trapped and lost, but i am really just happy.
i really like what i have right now.
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[26 Jul 2006|07:30pm] |
so i think i have wipe lash (sp?)
and i have a horrible sun burn.
i fell really hard yesterday while attemping to jump the wake and it didnt really hurt until this morning.
i was driving around and i turn my neck to see if any cars are coming and my neck wont move.
besides all the pain life is good. but i have decided i am the most impatient person in the world.
i hate waiting even if i know it is whats best for me.
i also really love all the people in my life right now...
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[24 Jul 2006|12:57am] |
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mood |
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content |
] |
crushes are so much fun.
but first dates make me want to vomit...and other things, as debbie may recall.
i am very content right now besides the fact myspace isnt working. :(
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| never eat at friday's |
[19 Jul 2006|11:55pm] |
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mood |
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 aggravated |
] |
worst experience ever.
to start off our waitress was hella dumb. she kept slurring her words and giggleing. then i ordered a quesadilla with no chicken and a salad. not too difficult right. so i get my food and she says here is your quesadilla with extra chicken...what? "oh i am just kidding there is no chicken" so i take a bit and it is full of chicken. dumb bitch. so i ask for a new one and remind her of my salad that i never got. then she comes out with a new one and no salad. so she goes back to the kitchen to get my salad and when she comes back with it she asks me how every thing is. "i dont mean to be a bother but the cheese isnt even melted." so she took that one back. at least i had a salad to eat at this point. she comes back with my third one cheese melted no meat but no wonderful dipping sause the first two had so i asked for it and she seemed really confussed. we dont have that....ok well i had it the first two times i had my food. so i ate this small quesadilla with no rice or avacado (which it was supposed to come with) oh and no dipping sause. oh and my water was empty. and you dont mess with liz and her water while she is eating. fill it up. it isnt that difficult. so i get the bill and on the menu the price was $8.95 but on the tab it was like $12 plus $2 for a salad.
moral of story dont open a resturant just because the building is done.
and dont hire every hooker to work there just because they are 18 and speak english.
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[16 Jul 2006|06:22pm] |
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in-n-out is a billion dollar company.
i think they should be able to invest in an air conditioner.
it was like 90 degrees in the stand.
and over a hundred by the grill.
i am so dehydrated.
more crystal light...yum.
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[12 Jul 2006|12:33am] |
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music |
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the mother, the mechanic, and the path |
] |
who needs friends when i have 3 new early november cd's...commuting music here i come.
orientation was horrible for the first 6 hours. i felt so out of place and alone. and then at lunch i had a panic attack because some lady was standing too close to me. yeah i am a little psychotic. i cried to my mom on the phone because everyone's parents were there and mine weren't and i yelled at my leader person because he was a dick and no help at all...but then the day people left and we started the overnight. my room mate ended up being the girl who helped me find the building and she was really cool and chill. perfect roommate material. then i met 2 other girls one from dixon who was a lot of fun and one from san diego and i still dont understand why anyone whould leave there for sac. but i got a really good scheduel. only tuesdays and thursdays so i dont have to go there too often. oh and i really think it is ironic that i have communications as my first class at 7:30 in the morning. damn i am not a morning person.
so besides my reoccuring panic attacks and ever constant stomach pains life is pretty good.
i still dont know how i am going to handle some of the people i rely on the most moving away. it is times like these that i need people to lean on to confid in and they are leaving me. i guess this is life and i will deal with it.
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[09 Jul 2006|09:44pm] |
i have orientation for sac state tomorrow.
i have to be at the school at 8am...really are they trying to kill me.
i am really nervous.
i am spending the night there.
i really dont like sleeping in strange places.
i really dont like driving places where i dont know where i am going.
i guess this starts a whole new adventure of doing things i really dont like doing.
the only plus to the situation is that i have 2 days off of work in a row...
well wish me luck with getting all my classes and for my room mates not to make fun of me when they see i dont have eyebrows.
maybe i just wont wash my face.
i cant let strangers see my naked face.
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